Heard By A Bird, January 28th
"The universe has a rhythm quite similar to Salsa music."
- Stephen Hawking
"My father squandered the family fortune on his inventions: a circular thermometer, the double-toothbrush, etc.," recalls Joseph Lewess. "That's why we grew up in a miniscule cottage with linoleum shingles."
Did you see the cloud shaped like the first four paragraphs of Jane Eyre over Pine Hill last Saturday?
Heard By A Bird Exclusive: Psychic Predictions for 2008
2008 will be a year of surprises, according to local psychic Milli Van Hooton. She predicts:
Hillary Clinton will grow a beard.
Mike Huckabee will convert to Scientology.
Canada will disappear.
Virtually everyone will buy a new sofa.
Cancer will be cured by a combination of bobby pins and wax.
Barak Obama will win the presidency, then change his mind and decide he'd rather be a weatherman.
Canada will reappear.
Paris Hilton will enter a doctoral program in plate tectonics.
The Beatles will re-form as a two-man band.
The latest craze on YouTube: watching people color in coloring books.
The corpse of Superman will be discovered.
George W. Bush will move to Uganda.
Shandaken Poetry Parade
[Note: Bakasana is a yoga position.]
- Clyde Hamstel
than I do.
- April Kennes
I spoke with Guy Bremmen, a metalworker in Chichester.
Sparrow: I understand you construct weathervanes.
Bremmen: I construct "hip weathervanes," to be specific.
Sparrow: What makes a weathervane "hip"?
Bremmen: It breaks the rules.
Sparrow: And what are the rules of weathervanes?
Bremmen: Basically, the rule is that every weathervane has to be a rooster. First of all, that's sexist. Why not a hen? Secondly, who cares about roosters, at this point in time? Most of us are more concerned with Johnny Depp.
Sparrow: What are some of the weathervanes you've created?
Bremmen: Many of them are portraits: Leonard Cohen, Spiderman, Thomas Wolfe, Patti Smith. My bestseller is the smiling head of Jerry Garcia. But I also make images of objects. I've done a bottle of Mateus, an asterisk, a laptop, a skateboard, a ladder.
Sparrow: What's the strangest weathervane you designed?
Bremmen: A lighthouse with a giant egg balanced on top.
Sparrow: Where do you come up with these ideas?
Bremmen: I have a conference with the customer. I call this the "image-formation consultation." Sometimes we'll talk for two hours, about icons and symbols that have meaning for the person. Then we'll settle on a design.
Sparrow: I suppose you have a background in art.
Bremmen: I did go to the Rhode Island School of Design for two years, then I dropped out. My designs, actually, are influenced by tattoos. A weathervane is a way of drawing on the sky.
For more information see www.bremmenweathervane.com.
"My father always wore a wristwatch on his ankle," Mike Throcker recalls. "He always said, 'If it's on my wrist, I'll be peeking at it all day. That's no life for me.' So he kept it as far from his face as possible."
Tags: Sparrow , Phoenicia , Heard , Bird , Michael
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