Obama's Super Secret Jobs Bill
Unidentified sources in the White House have confirmed that the Obama Administration is preparing the ‘mother of all re-election’ bills. The White House is just waiting until after the Federal default on August 2nd to announce the new jobs program. They are no longer concerned about the default, which will just hurt the Chinese, now that they have a real Plan B.
This bill will not only create 1 million jobs, but it will allow corporations to repatriate $1 trillion of profits from overseas tax shelters.
The legislation was inspired by an exchange of letters between John Chambers, CEO of Cisco, and Ralph Nader, political gadfly. Ralph is a long suffering Cisco shareholder. Cisco’s stock has declined from $70 per share in 2000 to $16 per share today; and it just started paying dividends. Ralph needs money to finance his blog, www.nader.org, that specializes in criticizing corporations, outsourcing and overseas tax shelters.
Mr. Nader asked John to increase the dividend or buyback stock with Cisco’s $43 billion of cash. John informed him that, unfortunately, his hands were tied because most of the $43 billion was overseas. John pointed out that if the $34 billion were repatriated to the US from overseas tax shelters, Cisco would have to pay Federal corporate income tax of 35% or $15 billion. Clearly, not in the interest of shareholders like Mr. Nader.
Instead, Mr. Chambers asked Mr. Nader to lobby his good friend Barack Obama to support the Homeland Investment Act of 2011, which would allow corporations to repatriate profits from overseas tax shelters – like the Cayman Islands, Bermuda, Ireland, Singapore and Cypress, all former British colonies – and only pay corporate taxes of 5.25%. This plan worked very well in 2005 when corporations repatriated $299 billion of profits and a full 8% was re-invested in job creation in the US -- the other 92% went to long suffering shareholders like Mr. Nader.
Unfortunately, for both Messrs. Chambers and Nader, the Ivy League socialists and former Daily Show writers who run the White House came up with a different plan. Their bill will grant American corporations the right to repatriate $100,000 of overseas profits TAX-FREE for every new hire that starts after November 6, 2011 and before September 30, 2012 [any jobs created after 9/30/2012 will have no effect on the election and are irrelevant] .
This bill should guarantee Mr. Obama’s re-election. Since US corporations have $1 trillion stashed overseas, the bill could create 1,000,000 jobs. With 1 million jobs under his belt, Mr. Obama should walk away with the election. Michele Bachman and her Tea Party caucus won't be able to come up with a more fair and balanced hand-out. [FYI, corporations will be allowed to fire the new hires without notice or separation pay starting on October 1, 2012, without penalty. ]
With $1 trillion trickling down into the economy via dividends and stock buybacks, the plan should spark a mini-boom in luxury goods for the rich and famous. The housing market in places like East Hampton, Coral Gables, Telluride and Carmel-by-the-Sea will see a pick up. And the Federal government will get a piece of the action via $150 billion in incremental tax revenues on the windfall dividends and capital gains.
I can't wait until August 3rd for the Homeland Jobs Creation Act of 2011.
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