One of the most common problem among married couples all around the globe is :
Infidelity of spouse.
Every third couple / person (male or female) go through the trauma of INFIDELITY OF
LOVED ONE / SPOUSE.
After 7 years of study ,wait and watch, examination, analysis, interviews, follow ups of
couples, single again(divorced/separated),re-married, several things were revealed
including psychological changes and various other aspects. This problem can be
broadly divided among two categories(and further sub-categories):
(I)Extra-marital relations having roots before marriage and exposure afterwards.
(II)Real extra-marital relations developed after marriage.
(I)*This categories can be broadly sub-divided among following:
1.The intimate relations developed before marriage get exposed.
2.Continuation of such relations even after marriage and getting exposed.
3.Putting an end to such relations after getting exposed.
(II)**This can be divided as:
1.Real development of relations with someone after marriage.
2.Continuity of these even after knowledge and exposure to spouse .
3.Putting an end to these after getting exposed, but, never losing a chance to hug the
third if sure about the fact that spouse won’t know about
it.THIS IS MOST COMMON.
*The reaction to these varies from person to person , situation to situation, culture to
culture, society to society. But the most common reactions seen are:
1.Tolerating and forgetting the biter things and experiences if the spouse puts and end
2.Brooding over this menace always.
3.Throwing abuses everyday.
4.Developing relations himself/herself as a revenge or thinking of paying back in the
5.Geting separated without divorce.
6.Geting separated after getting divorce.
7.Re-marriage after divorce with someone else.
8.Remain single after divorce.
9.Re-marring the previous spouse after mutual consent and agreement upon certain
things in future.
10.Developing inferiority complex.
11.Severe anxiety and depression.
12.Rarely ending up in murder or suicide.
*What-so-ever may be the reason and the reaction the two most important conclusions
1.KIDS SUFFER without any reason and fault of their own, often leading to
psychological disorders. So you must give TOP PRIORITY TO YOUR
KIDS before taking any decision.
2.Increase your tolerance as much as you can but up to a limit. Pray to Almighty : “O’
My God Give Me The Power And Will To Change The Things That I Can
,And, Tolerance Towards Things That I Can’t Change”.
Davd M. Buss : Journal of Social and Personal Relationships,Vol.14,No.6 (Sage Publications,1997)
MRC Astley : Fidelity and Infidelity in Marriage (Springer,1959)
SB Lev : Extra-Marital Sexual Affairs (Journal of Sex and Medical Therapy,1998)
LF Frelick : Marital Therapy in Psychiatric Practice (Brunner/Mazel,1987)
– DR.NAVRAJ SINGH SANDHU
+91 99157 75742